New Year's Ball

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What a year 2012 has been!  I'm so glad that Rachel invited us to a Blogger's Ball for New Year's Eve - it's such fun to hear what everyone else in the link-up has been up to and is anticipating!  You have to follow some guidelines if you want to join the party, which is good because otherwise I could go on for ages about everything that's happened since the first of January.  (There's a reason I published 297 posts in 2012, you know!)  She asked a few questions to help us sum up the past year...

What was your best part of 2012?  This is going to come as no surprise, but the best part of 2012 was getting engaged!  Jon and I knew for a while that we were heading toward this stage in our relationship, but that didn't detract from the surprise of the proposal or the absolute joy of sharing our news with friends and family.  It took me a little while to relax into wedding planning (and we've had a few tumbles over it) but we're now really enjoying this special time - even though we're spending most of it long distance!

What was your favorite song/book/movie of 2012?  Oh, this is hard - mostly because I sort of live under a rock when it comes to pop culture!  I guess I'd say that my favorite album has been the Nashville soundtrack, even though the show only premiered this past fall.  And the books I loved most this year were the first two in the All Souls Trilogy: A Discovery of Witches, actually published in 2011, and Shadow of Night, which came out in July.  My favorite movie was Skyfall, but I also thought that Pitch Perfect was so much fun.

What was your biggest accomplishment of 2012?  Since the past year has been one of huge transitions, I'd say that my biggest accomplishment - and the one I am most proud of - is that I feel much more confident in my identity regardless of my surroundings.  It's taken me years, but I'm finally  learning that who I am, which includes both the good and the bad, is something I can use to anchor me as circumstances continue to evolve; my history is part of what defines me and I don't need to change to fit into every new situation.

What are you looking forward to the most in 2013?  So much!  Chronologically, I'm looking forward to: my new job, my wedding, and moving out of my parents' house into my own apartment.  Unfortunately, Jon and I probably won't be reunited for good until 2014 - but 2013 brings us one year closer!

What are your New Year's resolutions?  You'll have to check back tomorrow to hear more about my resolutions for 2013!  You'll also learn more about that last answer...

Like last year, we'll be spending tonight and tomorrow at a friend's pile in Suffolk - we've got a three-course dinner, fireworks, and dancing ahead of us, plus lots of champagne on the agenda for the Eve!  Before I left DC, I ordered a dress from Coast and, since it's an English store, had it delivered to Jon's flat.  It fit perfectly except for the part where the hem ended about three inches higher than it should have, so I stopped by the Regent Street store on Thursday to return it and ended up exchanging it for this sparkly frock!  Then, on Saturday, I Jon and I popped into Peter Jones, where I found this faux fur stole (similar here).  I was looking for a clutch, but the wrap has pockets - perfect for a phone in one side and lipstick in the other!  Everything else for the party I brought with me; the heels were on massive sale at Nine West back in November, the earrings are from Kate Spade last Christmas, and the mascara and lipstick are in my usual rotation.  I thought it would be fun to jazz up the black with gold and fur - don't you?  Though the sequins make the dress party-ready regardless!

I hope you have a wonderful New Year's Eve, full of merriment and mirth.  See you in 2013, dear readers!

A London Interlude

Social media over the holidays is a strange beast; I'm still on Twitter and Instagram intermittently so I feel like I'm vaguely in touch with everyone, but I haven't scrolled through any blogs in days.  Is it even possible to catch up?  Who knows - my Google reader scares the [expletive] out of me at this point!  But you're here, so thank you.  Let's see, where did we leave off last time...

Yes!  After a gray and rainy morning spent recovering from Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and Boxing Day in Suffolk, Jon and I took the train back up to London on Thursday afternoon as the skies cleared.  We dropped our things off at his flat in north London and walked around the West End to see the Christmas lights.  Jon suggested we find a trendy restaurant for dinner, but I really wanted an old standby - Carluccio's in St. Christopher's Place!  We had many classic Lady and the Tramp dates over pasta there, so it was a lovely to slip back into the old routine.  Afterwards, we went to a friend's flat in Notting Hill overlooking West London for a party.  Somehow I convinced everyone to rock on when that wound down, and we found ourselves at the best whiskey bar in town.  Unfortunately, I was eventually reminded how expensive it is to take a cab in the wee hours of the morning.  Regardless, it was a brilliant night!

On Friday, I met Jon's sister and cousin for an appointment at a bridal salon in Islington.  I knew I wasn't going to buy my dress in London, but I really wanted to have that experience with Ellie and Rose and we had a blast!  Somehow, my favorite dress was everything I didn't think I'd want - it had tons o' lace and a ballgown skirt and was strapless.  It was great to get some new ideas, plus Ellie and Rose had a fab time modeling all the tiaras and bejeweled hairpieces.  We grabbed lunch at Pizza Express, a favorite from my student days, and then I went off to meet Jon to wander around Covent Garden for a while.  We popped back home quickly after that to get ready for our evening out: ice skating at Somerset House and a late dinner at Meat Liquor with friends!

Jon and I woke up late again on Saturday, and headed to Hatton Garden to check out wedding rings.  It was so strange to see something on Jon's finger - I'm not used to it, though of course it's very exciting!  Then we went down to Chelsea to do a bit of shopping along the King's Road.  After meeting up with a friend for coffee, Jon and I saw The Hobbit and then staggered home for a curry and TV with his flatmate Sam.

This morning, we caught an early train to Suffolk.  (Jon helped me with the Telegraph's 2012 big quiz on the journey - we got 84% together!)  We're in the country for New Year's through January 1, when we head back to London for my last few days here.  To be honest, we haven't done anything spectacularly special, but that's exactly how I've wanted it.  The best part of being reunited in my old town is just... being normal, you know?  It's heaven!  Hope you're having a lovely end of the month, dear readers.

Christmas in the Countryside

Oh, these are a lovely few days of peace after Christmas and before the New Year.  I hope you all are surviving the season, dear readers!  This was my third Christmas with my in-laws-to-be in Suffolk so I was fully prepared for all of the traditions that come with this holiday here, but three days of family and food and festivities were a whirlwind regardless and now, on the train to London, I'm ready for a break.  Though, knowing me, the next couple of days in town will be anything but restful... I've crammed in as many plans as possible already!  But let's catch up about Christmas, shall we?

Jon and his father picked me up from Heathrow early in the morning on Monday - wonderful men, they are! - and we drove east for nearly three hours into deepest Suffolk, arriving at the house with enough time to spare for a nap before more family arrived.  Once the house was full, we watched Love Actually and chatted over my homemade chocolate caramels and tea until dinner.  The 24th is always relatively calm: it's Jon, his parents and sister, his maternal aunt and uncle and their three teenagers, and me.  But after dinner and lots of wine comes the main Christmas Eve spectacular.

We all gather in the sitting room, draped over armchairs and sofas with wineglasses in hand, and light the fire as well as the candles on the tree and turn on the fairy lights and turn off the main lights.  Jon's father reads "Twas the Night Before Christmas" in a sonorous voice - apparently his asides have gotten more inappropriate as the kids have gotten older - and then the caroling begins!  We start with Once in Royal, of course, and continue on to the usual favorite hymns, meandering our way through seasonal pop hits.  The girls and boys pair off for Good King Wenceslas and Jon, his father, and his uncle each take a verse for We Three Kings.  Eventually we land at the Messiah with a rousing chorus of Hallelujah.  And with that, full of wine and song, we head to bed so that Father Christmas can surprise us with presents in the morning!

Christmas morning begins with the delighted shrieks of the cousins as they open their stockings, and Jon and his sister and I take ours, which were deposited at the foot of our beds in the night, into their parents' room.  We cradle mugs of coffee in our hands, curled up against the bedposts, as we take turns pulling one gift after another out of its paper and ribbons.  Once everything's been unwrapped, we get ready to make the pilgrimage to another aunt's house with much shouting of "I get the next shower!" and "Where are my boots?" and "Get in the car now!  Finally, though, we make it over a few villages and are greeted by Jon's paternal aunt, uncle, cousin, and their assorted guests.  Champagne and spiced nuts are handed round until the golden turkey, wreathed in a ceremonial halo of tinsel, makes its appearance to thunderous applause.  Then we sit down to a feast: turkey, of course, plus stuffing, cranberry sauce, bread sauce, brussels sprouts, parsnips, sausages, potatoes, and gravy.  The table is decked out with funny masks, Christmas crackers, and little presents - when the children were little, it was all to keep them entertained, but the tradition's been maintained even as everyone has grown up.  The Christmas pudding, set ablaze, is toasted around the table, and when the alcohol has burned out we douse it with brandy butter.  After we've eaten all we can, we light sparklers in the remains and cheer as they flame.

Then we decamp to the sitting room for the Queen's speech.  (2012 was quite a year for Great Britain, you know, and I found her words very stirring.)  Afterwards, all hell breaks loose as the youngest amongst us ferries presents from under the tree to their respective recipients, and wrapping paper and bows and thank-yous go flying across the room.  Finally, we collapse amongst the gifts and the rubbish and call for cups of tea so that we can revive ourselves for the trek back home.

The evening is spent in front of the TV, recovering from the day's exertions with the Doctor Who and Downton Abbey Christmas specials.  (Both were disappointing this year, unfortunately, though I promise I won't give anything more away!)

The main event of Boxing Day is the epic annual walk.  In the three years I've celebrated Christmas with Jon's family, we've gone a different route each time, but every walk has been rambly and beautiful and has ended at a pub for cups of tea and pints of Adnams.  This year, we covered about four miles through woodland and heath and along the beach.  England's had some serious flooding recently, which we experienced first hand as we waded nearly knee-deep through paths that had merged with the surrounding marshes!

Our final celebration of Christmas is the Boxing Day dinner, hosted by Jon's mother and with the same cast of characters as Christmas lunch.  We tuck into a huge ham with all of its accompanying side dishes and plus a delicious lemon meringue pie for dessert.  Then, once the guests have gone, we pass out, happy and full and, generally, more than a bit tipsy from the past three day's festivities.

And that's how we do Christmas in the countryside!  I hope you're all having a perfectly lovely week, dear readers, regardless of your Christmas-ness.  Happy everything!

And Peace On Earth

Christmastime Is Near

You might not have noticed - especially not around the blogosphere, where we're known for our subtlety - but 'tis the season.  I'm headed to England on Sunday night, where I'll spend two wonderful weeks with Jon and his family and our friends.  (Wait, you knew about that? I thought I'd hardly mentioned it!  Oops.)  Since I know that you're all going to be enjoying your own festivities between now and the New Year, I thought that this might be a good time to take a brief breather from my normal blogging schedule.  It'll be a holiday pause - or, if you will...

Man, I crack myself up.  Holiday paws!  Get it?  Because he's wearing a Santa hat and he's a dog, so... oh, sorry.  Yes,  I'll just go over there to get myself some more mulled wine now.

Anyway, there will be new posts throughout the next two weeks, but let's not stress about things, okay?  After all, Christmastime is here!

I hope you're all having a wonderful season, dear readers.

Happiness Is Here Already

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I was kind of a nightmare to be around last Christmas.  You probably wouldn't have noticed here - because we bloggers like to keep things sparkly even when we're keeping it real - but it was a tough time for me.  By Christmas, I had decided to quit my job in London which, we knew, meant that I'd almost certainly have to move back to DC before summer.  Jon and I had begun talking about what that would mean for us as a couple, but nothing was decided.  And, on top of all that, my grandmother had started to very seriously not be doing well.

So yes, there was a ton going on, and I was stressed out.  Although I'm ashamed of this, I admit now that I took a lot of my frustration and confusion and sadness out on Jon and those around us.  (You remember how I deal with stress, right?  They do say that the first step to solving a problem is realizing you have one...)

Things have really fallen into place since then, though, so there's no excuse for that sort of behavior this Christmas.  Yes, there are still changes afoot (some of which I'll be able to share soon!) but, relatively, life is great.  So this year, while I'm surrounded by Jon's family for two gloriously chaotic weeks, I'm going to make the above quote from Robert Holden my mantra.  I wish I had known of it last year, as it would have made a huge difference, but it's never too late to start with this kind of attitude.

Tell me, dear readers - where is your happiness this season?

Wedding Wednesday: N&P and M&D

Just a quick thank you to everyone who read and commented on yesterday's post - as I said in response to Lindsay, I'm confident that you all are being proactive in whatever way you can be, vocally or otherwise, to change our country and this world for the better.  It makes me so proud to have followers like you!

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Wedding Wednesday is way more fun than I ever thought it would be - on the bus back from New York yesterday, I had a blast planning the schedule for the next few months' worth of posts.  I can't wait to share some more of the decisions we've been making and the options we're still weighing.  Plus, in January, I'm going to introduce you to our bridal party!  But today is extra special.

Today I want to send love to two relationships that have taught me an enormous amount about how to make my own the best it can be: my maternal grandparents' and my parents' marriages.

Next week is actually my grandparents' 59th wedding anniversary - they wed in 1953 after being set up by mutual friends and it was wonderful to see, when I visited them earlier this week, how one is so much a part of the other, having spent decades bending together so that they are perfectly entwined.  As Jon and I embark on our own marriage, not much older than they were when they got married, it's truly inspiring to see this example of how two people can grow together while maintaining such strong senses of self.

To my glamorous Nana and the most handsome Pappy - happy anniversary.  I love you.

And this weekend is my dad's birthday!  But I can't really celebrate who my father is without mentioning his marriage to my mother because they've been together for 71% of his life.  And now that I'm living with them as an adult, I have a much deeper appreciation for who they are individually and as a couple and how one informs the other.  When you're a child, you think that marriage is a smooth ride from one end of the rainbow to the other.  Watching their relationship up close, though, now that I can understand some of what I see, has taught me that being in a true partnership is real work; love and marriage aren't always easy but when you choose, every day, to be with someone and to have faith in him/her and to love him/her through everything no matter what - well, I know that my relationship with Jon will be stronger for recognizing this.

So to Dad: happy birthday!  And to Mom: thanks for getting him here.  I love you both very much!

Speak Out

boys fishing at Wheaton Regional Park, MD; December 2012

Of course this post is inspired by the Blogger Day Of Silence that many blogs observed yesterday (and some are observing today) in memory of the tragedy in Connecticut last Friday; it would be disingenuous to pretend that my urgency here is anything other than a response to both the tragedy and to our community's corresponding reactions.  But it's an urgency that has been building for years and that should have reached a breaking point before the shooting - before the shooting at an elementary school in Connecticut, or at a Sikh temple in Wisconsin, or at a movie theater in Aurora, or any of a dozen shootings before that. The time to talk about the steps we need to take to ensure that these massacres never happen again was yesterday.

And we should talk.  "Only with gun violence," Ezra Klein of The Washington Post wrote last week, "do we respond to repeated tragedies by saying that mourning is acceptable but discussing how to prevent more tragedies is not."  We remember the victims of these horrific events with our silence, but we honor with them our words and actions - and today, despite everything, I ask you to speak out.

There are so many issues wrapped up in this devastating tragedy and all those that came before it.  We need to reexamine our gun control laws, certainly, but also how we deal with mental health in this country and how a culture of sensationalism has normalized violence.  If you do choose to memorialize what happened with a day of silence, please think not just about the senselessness of the killings but also about how we can prevent similar incidents in the future.  If you cannot yet enunciate how this tragedy affects you, please take the time and space you need to make sense of what you're feeling and why.  And if you are confused by the barrage of conflicting views on everything, including the right way to grieve and, yes, including this post, please educate yourself as much as possible so that you feel better informed and more in control.

But then we need to step forward and demand change.  As President Obama said on Sunday night at the interfaith vigil in Newtown, "We will be told that the causes of such violence are complex, and that is true.  No single law, no set of laws can eliminate evil from the world or prevent ever senseless act of violence in our society, but that can't be an excuse for inaction.  Surely we can do better than this."

We can do better than this and we must, so please take a stand and speak in whatever medium you are most comfortable.  In the long term, silence will not effect change; only words will lead to action.

Worst Christmas Songs Ever

In 2010, I gave you Hark, Hear the Bells, a post of my top 15 popular Christmas songs.  You got Music for Christmas Eve in 2011, guest-written by my friend Christine, which listed her 10 favorite choral Christmas carols.  And this year - drumroll please - we're going to talk about the worst Christmas music out there.

Jezebel actually did this last year, but I've never heard of the winning song.  One of my three worst songs is on the above list, so apparently everyone else likes the others that I hate.  (What does that say about me?  More importantly, what does that say about America?  Discuss amongst yourselves.)  I'll explain to you why these are my least favorite Christmas songs, but feel free to disagree in the comments.  After all, it's Christmas - a classic time to argue with those we love about things of little consequence!

3. Okay, it's not really fair for O Holy Night to have made it into my top three.  But one of my high school groups sang at Christmas in Washington back in 2001, where Charlotte Church performed this song - and, in the rehearsal, she totally screwed up the words and then blamed the choirs for throwing her off.  Real classy, lady.  Thanks for ruining this one for me!

2. Carrie Underwood can do no wrong in my book - unless these rumors that she's been cast as Maria in a remake of The Sound of Music are true, in which case I'm going to need to do some serious soul-searching - but I cannot stand this song.  There's good treacle and there's bad treacle and there's a time and a place for each.  But Do You Hear What I Hear? makes me nauseated.

1. My very least favorite Christmas song ever in the whole world did make it onto Jezebel's list, though it was knocked out after the second round.  I have no rational reason for hating The Little Drummer Boy - I just do. It tells a pretty sweet story, but not even that scene in The West Wing or the Justin Bieber version can make me like it.  This is definitely a case of #sorryimnotsorry...

How about you, dear readers?  What do you think is the worst Christmas song of all time?  And it's okay; you can be honest about my taste in Christmas music.  I won't be too offended!

The Sunday Currently III

statue outside the Children's Chapel at Washington National Cathedral

Given the heartbreaking events of last week, I'd like to start today's Sunday Currently off on a somber note:

praying... for all those affected by the shooting in Newtown, Connecticut on Friday. Nothing will repair the innocence lost, the families shattered, or the country shocked by the horrific deaths of 26 people in that elementary school.  But I am also...

hoping... that we take responsibility as a nation and recognize that this is the time to talk about gun control. Our leaders will only begin to address the inadequacies of our laws (relating to gun control and mental health care among others) if we urge them to. A change must be made and the change must start with us.

Now, although the massacre at Sandy Hook will never be far from our minds, I'm going to return to the Sunday Currently I had planned to write.  When we are hit with the realization that our lives can be taken away from us in the blink of an eye, it's important to relish what we have.  So, these days, I am:

listening... to Peter, Paul, and Mary's holiday album.  My sister and I grew up on a diet of The Weavers, Pete Seeger, and Peter, Paul, and Mary, and I find it incredibly comforting to play the tracks in the kitchen as my parents putter around.  My favorite is The Cherry Tee Carol.  (I did try to like the Sufjan Stevens holiday album, too, since everyone recommends it so highly, but just couldn't get on board.  Clearly my hipness peaked in 1967...)

watching... Suits!  Sarah's obsessed with this show; she convinced me that I should use my weeks of unemployment to get caught up on the first two seasons before the new one premiers in January.  I didn't think I could be into another show about lawyers, but I'm totally hooked.  The storylines are gripping, of course, though I'd pe perfectly happy watching an hour-long montage of Harvey simply existing in his supremely well-tailored Tom Ford suits.

cooking... my way through Foolproof, Ina Garten's new cookbook.  Mom went to the signing last week and picked up a few copies for us - I've totally been geeking out over it!  I love the Barefoot Contessa and I especially love that her recipes are usually simple and accessible, but sometimes I get a little frustrated with just how pared-back they can be.  However, this new cookbook manages to make the basics fun and interesting!  Tonight we're going to have her Chicken with Wild Mushrooms over mashed potatoes - yum!

drinking... ginger tea, still.  I found a new brand - Archer Farms, sold only at Target - that has the ideal lemon to ginger ratio and pairs perfectly with a teaspoon of honey.  (These are the important things, you know.)  But also I've discovered the black magic that is the Starbucks Salted Caramel Mocha, and I allow myself one short (aka kids' size) cup a week as a special treat.  Amazing!

marveling... at the wonderful strangeness of my adopted country.  Did you know that there's a BBC radio program where they broadcast church bells ringing for a minute and a half?  Every week features a different church from around the country - today it's York Minster.  Only in England...

loving... my new blog design by the very talented Bobbi from Ready to Blog!  We had a Skype consult a few weeks ago and I was delighted by how Bobbi took my ideas and ran with them so creatively. Plus, she installed everything in a way that will allow me to control the aesthetics of this blog as I wasn't really able to before.  Thank you, friend!

cleaning... up my Pinterest boards and the images on Betsy Transatlantically.  If you follow me on Twitter, you'll see my outraged grumblings every time I find a photo or graphic that isn't sourced properly - especially when it's reposted or repinned by a major blogger, who should know better - and so, following {av}'s tips and suggestions, I dove into my own Pinterest account to make sure that everything was appropriately credited.  Imagine my shame when I realized that I had to start even closer to home!  So if you ever feel the urge to go back into my archives, please be patient - it's going to take me a few weeks to straighten out 580+ pins and 750+ old posts.

trying... to shake this cold before my impromptu trip to New York tomorrow!  I felt it coming last Wednesday, when I spent the day wallowing in my lurgy, but it didn't really manifest until after yesterday's 5 mile race in Baltimore.  Hopefully it'll wear itself out today so that I won't spend the whole bus ride making my fellow travelers uncomfortable!

So yes, the past week has been pretty mellow.  But I've only got one more week at home - well, with Monday and Tuesday in NYC - before two weeks of Christmas in England and then - oh, and then!  I have news to share with you, dear readers.  You'll just have to be patient until I do!  And, in the meantime, I wish you all a very relaxing end of the weekend.

linking up with siddathornton today!
all photos from Instagram

Frock Fridays: Serious Sparkle

I love it when the theme {av} gives us matches up with what's going on in my life!  Okay, yes, linking up is fun regardless - but I feel like we're in a mind meld when her suggestion works with my calendar.

God, sometimes I am such a creeper.  Sorry!  Let's distract ourselves with the fashion, shall we?  Onward to some serious sparkle...

My two weeks in England over Christmas are primarily going to be spent in Suffolk; we'll be there with Jon's family from December 24th through the 27th and the 30th through January 2nd.  That only leaves four days in London, but you know me - I'm going to pack them to the brim! (That may be a mixed metaphor, but I can't remember the other half of either so we'll just have to agree that we all know what I mean.)  One of my favorite winter activities in London is taking in the sights while ice skating.  Can you imagine anything more romantic?

[ image sources: SH from LONDONSHOTS / NHM / ToL ]

Actually, I first went to the rink at the Natural History Museum with the little girl I babysat when I was a student in London in 2008, so my memories of that experience revolve around a tantrum.  (As soon as we got on the ice, she decided she didn't want to go ice skating; she wanted to see the dinosaurs.  After all the faff we went through to get there and the ordeal of putting on the skates... oof.)  And Jon and I tried to go to the Tower of London for ice skating last winter, but we'd bought the tickets well in advance and the whole city flooded the week we were supposed to go, so that was a bust.  The real romance, in my experience, is at the Somerset House rink.  In our first few treacly months of dating, Jon and I went to Somerset House to ice skate - it's right next to his old university and in an absolutely beautiful courtyard.  We took full advantage of our honeymoon phase by holding hands as we skated in the glow of the towering Christmas tree and whispering sweet nothings over hot chocolate in the Tiffany's café tent.  I bet we were totally obnoxious, to be honest.

But we're going back this year!  You do have to book tickets ahead of time as the popular dates and times sell out quickly, so we snapped ours up last week for the evening of Friday, December 28th.  We've sent an email around to some friends, inviting them to join us, and then we'll head out to a swankyish bar for the rest of the night.  (You're more than welcome to come too, dear readers!)  I'd love to wear something like this:

[ dress / coat / gloves / pashmina / earrings / ring / clutch / heels / skates / socks ]

I've got all of these pieces (or variations thereon) except for the dress.  I found it on Rent the Runway which means that it's definitely doable in terms of my budget, but the shipping timings won't work because I'll be abroad.  So hello, after-Christmas sales!

Christmas in Washington

I joke about being a Jewpiscopalian - that's a Jewish Episcopalian, you know, or an Episcopalian Jew - but, really, I love that I was raised to appreciate both my family's and my community's faiths.  I've talked about this before, almost exactly two years ago, but I think it's worth revisiting at this time of year.  These days, I don't think that the Christmas spirit has much to do with anything overtly biblical, and I think that by celebrating faith in all of its guises, especially when the days are short and dark, we come together in a really beautiful way.

Christmas has always been a vibrant part of my winter calendar in Washington.  From caroling on Capitol Hill to admiring the decked-out houses in Chevy Chase to making gingerbread men at the National Gallery's annual party to leading services at the Cathedral, I've loved participating in Christmas activities around town.  One of my favorite memories from childhood is of seeing the Nutcracker every winter, so I was thrilled when my friend Harriet suggested we snag tickets to The Washington Ballet's production at the Warner Theatre last week.  It was such a fun show, and perfect for my transatlanticism: the Nutcracker was George Washington, his soldiers were Revolutionaries, and the mice were Redcoats!

As soon as the overture began, I was transported to such a magical place, full of wonder and joy and imagination - make yourself a mug of hot chocolate and come with me!

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Wedding Wednesday: Gifts

I feel unbelievably lucky to have readers who are so engaged and enthusiastic - thank you for actively participating in all of my Wedding Wednesday posts!  It's really wonderful to get so much advice and so many perspectives from friends all over the world, all at different stages of their own stories.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Today's post is going to be pretty short, though I definitely welcome any comments you may have on the subject: since it's the season for giving, I want to talk just for a second about wedding presents.  Last week you all helped me with my transatlantic considerations, and we agreed that RSVPing yes to a destination wedding is a major commitment of time, energy, and money.  Jon and I are, obviously, incredibly aware of how much all of our guests - and especially the Americans - will be spending to join us, and we're beyond touched by everyone's generosity.

We did create a registry, but this is the language that, after many conversations, we decided to use on our wedding website:

I did a lot of research on different wedding websites before we published this.  Interestingly enough, none of the "experts" had any insight about this concern; all of the suggestions I found were on message boards, which I generally try to stay away from.  (There are some crazy women on those forums... beware!  And to the guy who wrote in to the New York Times with the second question here: I understand where you're coming from, but your second paragraph makes you an ass.)  We took our favorite phrases from a few different places, and cobbled them together into the above.  I'm not going to say no if someone wants to give us a KitchenAid mixer, of course, but we really do hope that our guests understand that, in this case, our present truly is their presence!

We did have tons o' fun when Jon came to DC for Thanskgiving and we spent an afternoon in Crate and Barrel with a scanner, but that's a story for another post!

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linking up with something charming today

Latkes

You know, dear readers, that we in my family are gastronomic Jews.  The traditions of Jewish cooking are woven through my DNA; I've always known that you should make brisket a day ahead of time because it's better after resting for many hours, that matzoh ball soup will cure any illness, and that when your great-grandmother's recipe calls for a "glass" of something it means that she used a recycled Yahrzeit candle glass to measure her ingredients.  I might love cheeseburgers - bonus points if there's bacon on top - but good Jewish cooking is in my soul!

Christmas overlapped with Hanukkah last year and I made latkes for Jon's whole family on Christmas Eve so that I could share my holiday rituals with them.  I decided to keep the recipe classic, since it was their first foray into Hanukkah, but there are some amazing creative options out there!  Let's feast our eyes on a few less-traditional latkes first, and then I'll share my mother's recipe for the potato pancakes of my childhood.

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As I mentioned last year, I couldn't use my mother's recipe because it's not - how shall I put this delicately? - exact enough for a latke novice.  If you want a classic recipe, I'm going to point you to this one, this one, and this one.  These tips (and these, and these) will help with any questions you might have.  And yes, the traditional toppings for latkes are sour cream and apple sauce.  Go with it!  It'll work, it won't work... nu, you'll eat them and you'll like them.

Now, over to my mother; the below is transcribed directly from a conversation I recorded exactly for this purpose last week.

First and foremost is the question of crispy versus not crispy latkes, and shredded potatoes or chopped up whatever potatoes. And we like shredded crispy latkes, so that answers that question.  So, here's the recipe.  You take some potatoes and you peel them and you put them in the food processor on the shred setting.  Then you put it in a bowl - everything, the potatoes, the liquid, the starch that settles on the bottom - and you crack an egg in and you mix it all up, I guess in theory to prevent it from turning brown.  Salt and pepper, a little bit of matzoh meal - that's how you know it's Jewish - and oh, and an onion!  Take about half an onion and put it in the shredder and then mix it all up.  And then what I do is I fry it in a pan.  Take about - depending on what size you want - a good dollop, maybe a tablespoon, you put in hot oil and you flatten it and when it starts to get brown and crispy on the bottom you turn it over and when that side gets crispy you can put it on a plate with paper towels to drain the grease.  Now, I often put zucchini or a little bit of carrot in the plain potato mix, especially when the kids were little and didn't notice, and sweet potatoes are really really good, but I don't go in for anything too crazy.

Well, there you have it.  Happy Hanukkah, dear readers!

Santa Baby

Dear Jon,

If you are reading this post - which is highly unlikely, given how often you come here, but I do want to cover my bases - stop right now. Go watch this instead.

Love always,
Betsy

I can't tell you how happy I was when I realized that a Venn diagram would perfectly explain this post.  Why craft sentences when two slightly-overlapping circles will tell the story just fine?  (This is a rhetorical question, by the way; there's no reason to not use a Venn diagram if the opportunity presents itself.)  But, since I am a blogger, let's throw in some words anyway.

Jon has a big birthday coming up in the spring and I'm going to give him an appropriately significant present for that - he knows what it is but you won't, dear readers, until closer to, as I must keep some things a surprise for you!  So I decided to give him a few smaller presents that he could unwrap on Christmas Day to draw out the excitement of the holiday.  Want to see?

Even though the total cost of the littler gifts probably does add up to one big gift, I feel okay about how much I've spent because I spaced out the purchasing over the last two months; I bought one piece every pay period so I could budget more responsibly.

These aren't the most exciting presents, but Jon goes for practical gifts and experiences over anything else.  If he can't use it, eat/drink it, or make a memory from it, he's not interested.  (Taking him to Paris for a weekend for his birthday in the first year we were together may be why we're engaged now!)  So I'll just give you the thinking behind each piece quickly:

I love Jon in blue sweaters because they match his eyes.  He's going through an elbow patches phase. Check and check!

The box is a bit more enigmatic - I had some special photos made for Jon and I'm going to put the prints in this box, which I've découpaged to reflect our long-distance status.

You might have seen my Instagram of the monogrammed passport case I bought Jon.  Since we travel so much, I thought it would be ideal!

And then two accessories for his beloved iPhone - a sturdy case to prevent a(nother) cracked screen and a spare battery to keep us in touch.  What a lucky guy, eh?

Speaking of lucky, I want to give a shout-out to Nicole's gratitude link-up today on Treasure Tromp.  It's important to remember everything that we already have, especially as we talk about what we want to receive this season!  Go check it out, and please join me in taking a minute today to appreciate what we have.

    

#Jewpiscopalian

Frock Fridays: A Scottish Christmas in Suffolk

We're now less than three weeks out from my flight to London to spend the holidays with Jon's family!  It'll be my third Christmas with my future in-laws - they welcomed me into their lives wholeheartedly on day one and we've continued sharing traditions and familiarity to the point where I absolutely do feel like part of the clan now.

Jon's family is originally Scottish and I thought that, this holiday, it might be fun to really embrace their history by wearing plaid on Christmas Day.  I don't know which tartan is theirs, so I decided to do a little research online and, last week, while FaceTiming with Jon, I excitedly shared my discoveries... only to be told that his family's story is nothing as romantic as the one I had found.  (You mean the internet can lie? No, say it ain't so!)  I can't actually share either ancestry with you because Jon treasures the little anonymity he has left on this blog, but he's given me permission to tell you that his family wears the Murray tartan, which is navy and green and red.  Hey, what do you know - I found a perfect dress in almost same pattern!  It must be fate.

Since the frock doesn't include any red, I thought I'd throw it in via my accessories.  Aren't these just the Christmas-est of colors?  That's also how I'm rationalizing the bows on the earrings and on the bracelets - it's the most wonderful time of the year, after all!

[ dress / jacket / earrings - sold out, similar here / bracelet / bag / tights / shoes ]

linking up with long distance loving today

Hanukkah in the House

One crisp late-November afternoon, a blogger curled up on the couch with a cup of tea and her laptop.  She clicked through holiday inspiration on Pinterest, humming along to the Pandora Christmas station - but soon her cheer turned less cheerful and her glee less gleeful.  For where were all the Hanukkah decorations?

It's going to come as no surprise to longtime readers of Betsy Transatlantically that I am she, the above blogger and Dr. Seuss impersonator.  But really - why don't we see more creative photoshoots in Jewish homes?  I love Christmas moodboards just as much as the next Jewpiscopalian, but I'd also like to recognize this minor but lovely holiday that celebrates my people's commitment to our faith.  So I went trolling the interwebs for Hanukkah* decor.  My search was a bit frustrating at first, since I don't think that throwing a bunch of Magen Davids onto a table or a mantel automatically makes a house more festive, but I did manage to find some beautiful ideas in the end partly because I appropriated some of the (ahem) less religious elements of Christmas decorating into what I consider acceptable for Hanukkah decorating.

They've given me some good ideas for when I come to decorate my own future home for the holidays, but they've also inspired me to think even more creatively about what it means to celebrate Hanukkah in this day and age.  And, on that note, I give you also my new favorite Hanukkah song, which may possibly blow your mind.  Dare you to go about your normal life without singing the chorus!

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*I have discovered that searching for "Hanukkah" decor only gets you so far; you also have to search "Hannukah" and "Chanukah" and "Channukah" and so on. Darn transliteration!

Wedding Wednesday: Transatlantic Considerations

Okay, this isn't the most creative title for a Wedding Wednesday post ever - unlike yesterday's post, which is still cracking me up.  ("Danger's my middle name...")  I wasn't sure what else to say, though, as it's sort of a catch-all for everything we have to take into account due to the transatlantic nature of our engagement and marriage.  We've touched on some of this over the past few weeks, but I wanted to take a day to focus on some of the details that set a destination wedding apart from the usual hometown celebration.

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Even though only half of the guest list is coming from the States, ours will be a destination wedding for every single person who RSVPs yes.  Our venue is a 2 hour train ride away from London, where most of our English friends are based - only Jon's immediate family lives in Suffolk.  Of course, the Brits only have to block out a day or two to join us, whereas the Americans will have to book flights and take more time off.

But also our wedding is on a bank holiday weekend in the UK.   A lot of people plan to go out of town at the end of August, and we want to claim space on the calendar as far ahead as possible.

Both of these facts contributed to our decision to go by a revised timeline so that we could make life as easy as possible for our guests.  Usually, Save the Date cards are sent six to eight months ahead of time, but we posted ours at the end of November and beginning of December - nine months before the wedding.  We aim to have the invitations out by May 1, which is nearly four months in advance rather than the recommended six to eight weeks.  We'll also be requesting that RSVPs come in a bit earlier than usual.

We really do hope this helps our guests, especially those who need the time to look for plane tickets they can afford!

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The one thing we have no idea how to prepare for is our rate of acceptance.  Wedding websites generally agree that you can expect 10-20% of your list to decline your invitation, which would mean that we'd have 110-124 guests with us for the weekend.  However, the predictions vary widely for destination weddings - some say that, because you're giving people much more notice and they'll treat your wedding as a holiday, you should plan for 100% acceptance; others say that, because of the costs and travel time involved, you can assume 50% acceptance.  Obviously, there's a huge difference between those two possibilities.

I've heard horror stories about whole tables of guests not showing up having RSVPd yes as well as whole tables of guests arriving not having RSVPd at all.  Maybe I'm being naïve, but I don't think that this will be a huge problem for us as everyone has to plan to attend (or not) our wedding well in advance.

And, actually, we've already gotten a few solid replies just from the Save the Dates.  We have one friend coming from Australia who booked her flight back to London last week, and two friends who know that they won't be able to come because of school and work commitments.  I wondered if it would be bad etiquette to ask for RSVPs on the Save the Dates - apparently it can be done but isn't really the thing to do, if you know what I mean - because the earlier we get a good idea of numbers the sooner we can finalize the other pieces of the wedding.  But I'm learning that you just have to be patient for so many wedding-related things!

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If any of you have any experience with acceptance rates for destination weddings - or, really, with any of our transatlantic considerations - please leave me a comment of wisdom!  We could really use some help here.  After all, we've never done this before!

linking up with something charming today